A Shocking Week
by Sir Edward
Summary: [Parody] Cloud and Tifa have somehow switched bodies, and now they're going to have to live as each other...  Will they be able to make a convincing attempt at being eachother, or will the group find out?  May contain OOCness...  Enjoy, and please R&R!
1. In the Bathroom

This is a story that may contain OOCness on both Cloud and Tifa's parts, so bare with it... I hope it's funny.

Sir Edward

A Shocking Day

Chapter 1: In the Bathroom

Cloud woke up at 3:00am. He looked around his room and noticed that it wasn't his own room...

"_Where am I?_" He thought, looking at the pictures of different Avalanche members lining the walls, and a small desk that had a pair of brass knuckles sitting on its smooth surface.

He groaned, and checked the clock.

"_3:00 in the morning? And I'm in Tifa's room...? What the hell happened last night?_" He thought, scratching his aching head, cursing Barret for giving him too much vodka last night, but he didn't feel nails scratching his scalp, but the feel of a thin black glove rubbing his itch.

He got up to go to the bathroom, but something was strange. When he sat up, his chest gave an odd bounce. His eyes widened in shock, and he went to touch his chest to confirm what had bounced, but he stopped.

"_I hope it isn't what I'm thinking it may be..._" He thought,

He slowly got up, and crept to the bathroom.

When he was in, he ran to the mirror, not to find his pale face staring back at him, but Tifa's. He almost screamed, but managed to cover his mouth with a gloved hand, and muffle the noise before it woke everyone, including Vincent, who was slumbering in the basement.

He stared at himself in the mirror, and Tifa stared back, her face contorted into a face that looked like the 'Scream'.

"_This has to be a dream... This has to be a dream... This has to be a dream..._" Cloud thought, pinching his arm.

"OW!" He cried out, and his chest gave an odd lurch, causing him to fall.

"How the hell does she live with these" Cloud muttered, poking the unbalancing breasts.

"_These are... real? Damn it! It's not a dream!_" He cried in his head, when he heard a yell coming from his room.

He stared at the closed bathroom door, when it suddenly burst open.

"Oh my god! What the hell happened?" Cloud (who is actually Tifa) shouted, seeing the real Cloud standing in front of the mirror.

"Are you... me?" Tifa asked, looking at Cloud who was staring at Tifa.

"I hope you didn't wake anyone." Cloud said, waving his gloved hand at the door to indicate the rest of the group.

"What the hell is going on?" Tifa whispered furiously, pointing to herself.

"Well... I have no clue... I woke up, and I was you... I guess the same thing happened to you... except you're me..."

"I don't want to be you!" Tifa nearly shouted, but controlled herself at the last moment.

"Well I don't want to be you." Cloud stated with the same emphasis as Tifa.

"What do we do...? I mean this is really weird... We switched bodies Cloud... How do you think that happened?" Tifa asked, hoping Cloud would know.

"How would I know? I just woke up with a massive hangover! I can't even see straight, let alone _think _straight!"

"Well, should we tell the others?"

"They won't believe us! They'd think we'd gone crazy... I don't need that. It'd give them an excuse to really think I've flipped my lid!" Cloud said, as he waved his arms, his chest bouncing awkwardly.

"And how the hell do you live with these?" He said, jabbing himself in the breast, and hurting himself.

"OW!" He cried, as a sharp pain ran through his body.

"Don't you hurt them! I don't want to switch back to my own body to find that I've been all bruised and battered!" She cried, as he rubbed the sore spot.

"Sorry! I keep forgetting that I've got them!" He replied, as his mind reeled with randomness of the situation.

"Let's just go back to sleep and hope it's fixed by morning." Tifa said, hoping that it would all just be a _very_ vivid dream.

"Fine, but if it doesn't... What the hell are we going to do?" He asked.

"We'll just have to pretend." She said, putting her hands on her hips, in a most Tifa like manner.

"Uh... I don't do that, so... If you're going to be me, then you'd better try harder." Cloud said, his brain still not fully comprehending the situation they where in.

"Let's go... I want this nightmare to be over." She said, turning and leaving the bathroom.

Cloud followed, and they both went to their rooms.

"Uh... Cloud? I think we should switch rooms, don't you?" She asked, her voice deeper than she was used to.

"Yeah... I guess so." Cloud said, walking over to Tifa, and entering her room.

Tifa went to Cloud's room, and both slept very fitfully until morning.


	2. Oh, the Trouble with Clothes

Chapter 2: Oh, the Troubles with Clothes

Cloud woke up, and found he was still in Tifa's room.

"_Shit! We didn't switch back! I should've guessed that we wouldn't!_" He sat up, and shook his head, long black hair waving back and forth gently with each shake.

He stood, and nearly fell over, because his breasts gave an odd lurch as he stood.

"_I hate these things! They're fun to look at, but they suck to actually have... How the hell does she put up with them?_" He inwardly cursed that he had to switch with Tifa of all people.

"_Why couldn't it have been Yuffie? At least then I wouldn't have to put up with breasts!_"

He staggered to the bathroom, and got to the toilet. He reached down to unzip his fly but found that there wasn't one in the shorts he wore.

"_Oh god! I hate this!_" He thought, as he pulled down his pajama shorts, to find that he was wearing a black thong.

"Christ! She wears these?" He said out loud, shocked at the discovery he made.

He pulled it down, and found that he didn't have his parts either.

"_I miss Mr. Happy..." _He thought, looking sadly down at his privates.

"_How the hell do I deal with this?_" He thought, looking down at the mass of hair in his pubic area. He sat down on the toilet and went, feeling relieved.

When he finished, he stood, and pulled up the thong.

"_I'm a guy, who's become a female, who likes to wear thongs... Just great._" He thought, leaving the bathroom to run into himself.

"Cloud!" Tifa whispered furiously, looking at him in a slightly panicked manner.

"What?" He said, looking up from the ground, mourning the loss of Mr. Happy.

Tifa pointed to a bulge in her pj shorts, and exclaimed.

"What the hell is wrong with it? It's been like this for like two hours! How do you sleep with a pole in your pants?" She said quietly, in a tone that betrayed her loathing of Mr. Happy, and his antics.

"Well..." Cloud flushed a shade of bright red, and shook his head.

"What? What do you do to fix it?" She pleaded quietly, begging Cloud to tell her.

"I um... You know..." He said, and then he motioned with his hands.

"YOU DO THAT!?" Tifa whispered, unable to believe that Cloud could do such a thing.

"Well... Yeah..." He replied, his face getting redder.

The conversation was interrupted by a door swinging out into the hall and Yuffie walking out looking like she just woke up, her short black hair sticking up in odd places.

"'Morn." She mumbled, walking almost zombie like into the bathroom.

"Good morning." Tifa said, smiling.

Cloud nodded, and turned back to Tifa.

"Cloud...? What's with you being so chipper in the morning?" Yuffie asked sleepily, rubbing her eyes to rid them of the grit from sleeping.

"Uh... I slept well?" Tifa said, fumbling to recover herself.

Yuffie grunted, and went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.

"Nice one! You almost blew it on the first try!" Cloud complained in an undertone, jabbing Tifa in the shoulder with a long finger.

"OW!" Tifa exclaimed, holding her shoulder, and looking pissed at Cloud.

"If you weren't me... I'd deck you!" She said in a threatening tone, holding a thin arm up, her hand balled into a fist.

Cloud looked happy that he had not gotten punched, knowing Tifa's punches felt like bullets.

Tifa gave Cloud a disapproving look, and then said, "We should get dressed..."

She turned from him, and walked away, heading to Cloud's room. Cloud watched after her, and decided that it would be best if he got dressed. He grunted, and turned to Tifa's room, walking in and shutting the door.

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Tifa opened up Cloud's dresser, and found a bunch of SOLDIER outfits crammed into it. She grimaced, hating the ugly blue and grey clothes, even if they made Cloud look damn sexy.

She pulled out a shirt, pants and a pair of black socks, and put them on. She made a note that she'd have to help expand Cloud's wardrobe once this odd experience had run its course.

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Cloud on the other hand was not having such an easy time of getting dressed.

He stood in the middle of the room, struggling to figure out how to put on a bra, and found that it was difficult to even understand the garment, let alone put it on. Finally, he gave up, tossing the large cupped bra into the corner of the room, opting to not wear one at all.

"_How do they wear these things? I seriously don't get how women even put up with them... Well, better get a shirt and pants on._" He thought, opening up Tifa's closet.

What he found in it made him want to hide.

He couldn't make himself wear any of the shirts she usually wore, the ones that made her 'pop out' as Cid liked to say. He searched her entire closet, finally dragging out the only decent shirt that Tifa owned, an ugly pea green shirt with orange stripes running horizontally around it. He slid it over his head, and pulled it over his chest, the soft fabric caressing his skin, making him shiver.

"_What's that feeling? It was... nice._" He thought, looking at himself in the mirror, and nodding, even thought the shirt was too small for him.

He routed through her pants, and found a pair that didn't cling to his body, making him feel like he had paint on pants, and nodded at the horridness that was his clothing.

"_This isn't a typical Tifa, but I can make an excuse..._" He thought, looking at the pea green shirt with orange stripes, and the dark green and blue plaid pants that where two sizes too big for Tifa's wide hips.

He nodded one last time, and opened the door, to find Tifa standing there.

Tifa stared at Cloud, her eyes full of horror as she witnessed the sight that stood before her.

"What... the hell... are... you... WEARING?!" Tifa asked finally, shoving Cloud back into her room, and slamming the door.

Cloud gave her a confused look, and waited as Tifa talked herself hoarse about the monstrosity of the clothes he chose to wear.

"Cloud Strife your sense of fashion continues to kill me. First I find that you only have SOLDIER uniforms, and then you come out looking like a clown from a frat party! And you're not even wearing a BRA! How do you expect to make it look like you're me, if you don't even dress like I do!? How do you expect to be able to do anything with your chest bouncing around like a gymnast? Tell me... How is it that you don't know that those colors make me look horrid? I NEVER wear those colors, and these clothes came from my aunt Susie! I don't wear ANYTHING that she sends me! She has an abomination of a fashion sense! Tell me yours is better?" She said, without so much as a hesitation between words,

"And you didn't even brush your hair! Look at the snarls in it! You must thrash around like a dying fish while you're asleep! Goodness, just because you go around looking like you've got a chocobo on your head, doesn't mean that I want to look like that too!" She cried pointing at the state of mess her normally beautiful hair was in.

Cloud just looked taken aback, as Tifa rushed forward, and began to remove the clothes he had on, practically ripping off the pea green shirt in contempt.

"Now... I'll help you dress properly, seeing that you have no clue how to dress yourself. First I'll show you how to put on a bra..." She said, and then stopped suddenly, as a strange feeling crept into her mind.

"_Wow is he sexy when he's me... The way he tries to modestly hide his chest behind his arms... Wow... I didn't know I could look so adorable!_" She thought, making a mental note to try this on someone when she was herself again. She gave Cloud a grin, and patted him on the shoulder.

Cloud gave her a weird look, stepping back slightly, and looking down at the bra.

"Do I have to wear one?" He complained, looking back at her for an answer.

"Hell yes you do! I don't want premature sagging! I'm too young to look like a grandma!" Tifa snapped, her voice deeper and louder than she had intended.

"Let the whole place know why don't you!" Cloud said, slapping one hand on his hip, in a decidedly Tifa manner.

Tifa looked at him, and then broke out laughing.

"It looks like you might be okay if you keep that up!" She said as she bent and picked up the bra from the corner.

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After thirty minutes of struggling, Cloud got the basic idea of how to wrangle a bra on.

He stood, gazing hatefully at the bountiful bosom that now wobbled in unison, instead of in random directions, but he had to admit that the bra did help him with his balance.

"Now let's do your shirt... I've got a great one for today! It's supposed to be hot out, so I decided that I'd try one of my summer shirts." She said gaily, as she took out a black tank top, with a low cut neckline.

"This should do nicely!" She said, tossing Cloud the top, as he stared in horror.

"This thing is WAY too small! How do you wear them?" He whined as he put the shirt on,

"I just do Cloud... Stop complaining and put it on!" She replied.

Cloud glanced at himself in the mirror, and almost fainted.

"_I'm too sexy... TOO SEXY!_" He thought miserably, waiting for Tifa to give him some pants.

"Here, take these!" She said, tossing the pants over his shoulder, and smirking.

Cloud gaped at the pants when he saw how tight they where.

"You want me to... wear these?" He gasped, as Tifa nodded yes to his question.

He put them on silently; cursing all of the forms of God he could come up with, for their morbid sense of humor.

When he had finished, he could barely breath, as he found the true meaning of 'hip hugger' pants.

Tifa gave Cloud an appreciative once over, and slapped him on the butt.

"You're ready to face the world my friend." She said, grinning at how evil she was being.

"You really... want me to... go down... looking like this?" He gasped, clutching at his waistband to try and loosen it.

"Yup!" She said, opening the door slowly, and checking to see if anyone else was in the hall. No one was, so she strode quickly from her room, and went downstairs, leaving Cloud to contemplate his new attire.


	3. Cid  I'm Going to Kill You!

Chapter 3: Cid... I'm Going to Kill You!

Cloud finally got over his clothes, and started downstairs his face red from embarrassment, and his arms crossed over his ample chest. When he reached the bottom, he was greeted with a catcall from the other side of the room, from what seemed to be a newspaper that had sprouted hair that looked a lot like Cid's.

"And what was that for?" Cloud snapped, glaring at the newspaper.

The paper shifted slightly, and gave a cough.

"Nothin'." Came a gruff voice.

"Nothing my ass!" Cloud said, walking over and ripping the paper from Cid's hands.

"Whatahyahdoin'?" Cid cried, reaching out to snatch back the paper.

"Did you just whistle at me?" Cloud said angrily, holding the crumpled paper in one hand and pointing with the other.

"Yeah... I did, but yah never fuckin' cared before!" He replied, flinching as Cloud raised a callused fist.

"Don't make me take off your little dangly... I'll do that you know? Like I threatened Don Corneo..." Cloud said in a VERY intimidating voice.

"You... you wouldn't... hurt Mr. Wanky?" Cid said staring at the fist, and covering 'Mr. Wanky' with his hands.

"Oh you bet I would... Like this..." Cloud said holding out the paper, and ripping it into pieces with a look of evil in his eyes.

Cid just choked, and turned very pale, as the shredded paper fell to the floor like snowflakes.

"Exactly like that!" Cloud snapped, and then walked away, leaving Cid to sit on the chair, holding his parts, and looking like a ghost.

A few minutes later, Yuffie walked into the kitchen, looking bedraggled, but freshly showered.

"What's wrong with Cid... He was holding himself like someone threatened to remove his dick?" She said, her voice still groggy, even after the 45-minute shower (which was icy cold, not because she wanted it that way, but because the heater bill was never paid) she had taken.

Cloud smiled viciously, and nodded.

Yuffie's eyes widened.

"You didn't!" She said, and then started to laugh, clutching her stomach with a slim arm.

There was an odd sound of clomping feet, and Tifa burst into the room, glaring at Cloud with a look of disgust on her face.

"What the hell did you do that for Cloud? You're such a basta..." She didn't finish her sentence, but instead covered her hand with her mouth.

"What's up with you?" Yuffie said, glaring at Tifa and wondering what the hell had happened to Cloud.

"Uh... I forgot to take my meds..." And she dashed off, closely followed by Cloud, who didn't even bother to make an excuse, leaving Yuffie to stare after the two as though she where contemplating the meaning of life, and failing miserably to understand it.

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"What the hell was that?" Cloud spluttered in shock, staring at Tifa as she stood with her head bowed.

"I... I forgot... But what you did to Cid was... Mean." Tifa said in a whisper, looking downtrodden and dejected, which was strangely enough a perfect Cloud look.

"Well you just blew it Tif! You didn't even last a minute!" He cried trying to think of a way that he could fix the current situation.

"No! You blew it first! You nearly gave Cid a heart attack, by threatening to remove his cock! I'm not that big a bitch Cloud!" She replied, feeling a little more confident in herself.

"So, I'm not taking meds, and I don't accuse you of being me! I don't even talk all that much." Cloud said, fists against his hips, with a look of discontent painted clearly on his face.

"Look imbecile, we're in this boat together... Let's fix the mistake and try again, Yuffie is pretty gullible, we should be able to pull something off..." Tifa said, sensing the fight that threatened to get very loud, and that's the thing that they wanted least to happen.

Cloud gave a grunt, and turned away, putting his hand on his chin.

"I think we go in there, and we tell her it was a joke, and then she'll be happy."

Cloud nodded, and then turned to her, a questioning look on his face.

"Why do you put up with Cid and his odd behavior?" Cloud asked, looking at Tifa for an answer.

"Well... I really don't care much about what he does, just as long as he keeps to himself... He's a good guy, and I don't think he'd do anything bad to me, so I just let him do it."

They spoke of their plan, and then shook hands to seal the deal.

They agreed, and turned and went back into the kitchen to find Yuffie still looking puzzled about their odd antics.

"What the hell was that all about Tifa?" She asked, putting her hand on her head as if she had a headache.

"Joke." Cloud said, and turned away, to find Tifa glaring at him.

"What?" Yuffie replied, still just as confused as ever.

"It was a joke darling... Nothing more." Cloud repeated, turning and grinning in a very odd manner (he wasn't used to smiling all that much).

Yuffie gave him a strange look, and turned to Tifa.

"And I never would have guessed that you had a sense of humor, Mr. Pissypants."

Tifa gave a curt nod, and proceeded to glare around the room.

"No really... Since when have you found it funny to have a sense of humor?" Yuffie persisted, which seemed to be the only way to get a straight answer from Cloud when he was in one of his pissy moods.

"It was her idea... She made me do it..." Tifa said, pointing at Cloud.

Yuffie turned to Cloud and smiled.

"Wow! You got Spiky to speak? Can you teach me how to do that?" Yuffie asked him, a look of hope in her eyes.

"Why would you want him to talk?" Cloud replied, curious as to why Yuffie would want to talk to him.

"I'll tell you later... We can have a girls night out and go to the bar!" Yuffie said with a mischievous look in her eyes.

"You're a little young for the bar toots." Cid said as he walked into the kitchen, and then he caught sight of Cloud, gave a gasp, and fled the room holding himself.

Yuffie gave a mirth filled laugh, and turned to Cloud.

"You scared him pantsless! That's another thing you're going to have to teach me!" She said, tears leaking down her cheeks as she laughed in amusement.

"I should actually apologize to him... I had a headache when I came down, and I snapped at him..." Cloud said. He looked unsure of what he had said, and he faltered several time, apologies where not his cup of tea either.

"Well... I suppose you could... But I like that he runs away! Gives me something to smile about!" Yuffie complained, grabbing Cloud's arm.

Cloud reflexively moved back out of Yuffie's grip, and then he left to go and tell Cid that he was sorry.

Tifa glared at Yuffie, and followed after Cloud, to see if he did what she had told him to do.

Cloud stepped up to Cid, trying to look kind, but failed to do so entirely.

He smiled at Cid, in what he thought was a 'I apologize' way, but Cid saw it as a 'I'm going to eat your babies' smile, and instantly turned into a blubbering heap on the floor.

"Please! PLEASE! DON'T HURT... MY FAM...ILY J...J...JEWLES! I... I COULDN'T... LIVE... I COULDN'T LIVE... WITHOUT THEM!" He bawled, curling up into a small ball on the ground, covering his precious bundle.

Cloud stared down at him in shock, and couldn't say a word, until something hard hit him in the back of the head.

Tifa cleared her throat, and glared, and Cloud nodded.

"Cid... I'd like to apologize..."

"DON'T HURT THEM!" Cid screamed, trying to find a way to escape.

"I really shouldn't have said that... I was... In a bad mood... Sorry."

Cid continued to cry in panic, gripping himself, as he rocked back and forth, trying to calm himself.

Cloud bent down, and after a few moments hesitation, and a glare from Tifa, and wrapped his arm around Cid's shoulder.

Cid froze instantly, and his eyes widened in horror.

"I won't do it... I'm sorry I... Threatened you." Cloud said, in a tone that was supposed to be resentful, yet came out as a more frightened tone because apologizing was difficult.

After a few moments, Cid let go of his balls, and looked up at Cloud.

"You're... you're really sorry?" He asked, his face still pale from his shock.

"I am... Very sorry." Cloud said, and he leaned in and, hating every moment of it, planted a chaste kiss on Cid's forehead.

Tifa had to leave the room to keep from laughing, as she saw the look of disgust on Cloud's face as he stood up and started to leave.

"Hey Tif?" Cid began, his confidence back up to normal standards.

"What?" Cloud asked, turning around with a smile, so that he didn't scare Cid again.

"You got a nice ass!" He said, pointing to the mirror on the wall behind Cloud.

Cloud just glared at Cid, and said,

"I'm going to kill you! You little..." And rushed to tackle him, but Cid was too fast, and Cloud couldn't run well, for his breasts kept throwing him off balance.

"_I'm going to kill that pervert one of these days!_" Cloud raged in his head, as he toppled onto the sofa, for he had taken a corner to sharply, and his breasts had pulled him into and odd stumble, that ended with a face plant into the cushions.


	4. Girls Night Out

Chapter 4: Girl's Night Out

At 8:30pm, there came a knock at Tifa's door.

Cloud got up, and answered it, and was not surprised to find Yuffie standing there, looking very excited.

"Let's go Tifa! I want to take that Girl's Night tonight! The band 'Children of the Zolem' are on stage at Shadegg's Pub, and I want to go see them!" Yuffie said, bouncing in a very animated manner.

Cloud gave a nod and smiled, still trying to get used to the feeling.

Yuffie grabbed Cloud's hand, and dragged him to her room, and presented him with an open closet.

"Help me pick out a cool outfit! I want to look good for the lead singer... He's a hottie that one." She said, dancing on the spot, watching as Cloud stared at the box of materia that had its lid off.

"Hey... Isn't that my Lifter summon?" Cloud cried, pointing to the small red sphere in the box, eyes wide and mouth hanging open in shock.

"Uh... Heh... No... That's Cloud's..." Yuffie said, quickly jumping up and putting the lid on the box, and hiding it behind her back.

"GIVE IT BACK! I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THAT FOR AGES NOW!" Cloud bellowed, nearly flinging himself onto Yuffie, in hopes of grabbing the box.

"It's Cloud's!" Yuffie cried, jumping back to avoid Cloud's snatching hands.

Cloud stopped, and looked at Yuffie. He was having a lot of trouble not throttling her, as he had now found the summon that she told him he lost when he fell into the Life Stream a while ago.

"Sorry..." Cloud said, turning back to the closet to help her pick out an outfit.

Yuffie looked puzzled, but came back over, not taking the box from behind her back, and sat on her bed.

"So... Help me with my clothes!" Yuffie asked, watching as Cloud scanned the wardrobe.

After ten minutes, Cloud grabbed Yuffie's favorite shirt (a black and green shirt, with a logo of an angel and a devil on it, with the words "I'm a Bipolar" written in smoky letters), and tossed it to her. He pulled out a pair of black denim shorts, and added that to the pile too.

"Hey, that's not a bad idea! I like the way you think!" Yuffie said, as she began to strip off her shirt, tossing it aside, while Cloud made a desperate attempt to turn away so that he didn't see her.

"I need a better bra though." She said, taking off the one that she was wearing, and then began to rummage through her clothes to find a better one. Then she noticed Cloud, and gave him a puzzled look.

"What's up Tif? Why're you looking away? You've seen me topless before... You always help me with my clothes when we go out." Yuffie said walking to stand in front of Cloud, completely shameless of the fact that she had no top on.

Cloud looked up, and felt his face turn red as he saw Yuffie in her semi-naked state.

Yuffie raised an eyebrow, and then turned back to looking for a bra.

Cloud continued to try to look away, not wanting to add to Yuffie's suspicion.

She found one, and pulled it on, while Cloud thanked the stars that it was over, but then he saw her taking off her pants, and he shook his head, and looked away again.

Yuffie hadn't noticed Cloud's behavior, for she was admiring her underpants, then she turned to Cloud and said.

"I forgot I had these on! Aren't they cute Tifa?" She said, trying to show Cloud the chocobo printed underwear, but Cloud was studiously looking in the other direction.

"Seriously Tifa, am I too ugly to look at or something? You could tell me that..." Yuffie said as tears began to from in her eyes.

"No..." Cloud said, and he turned to look at the underwear.

His eyes fell on her hips, and he couldn't pull them away... It was the first time he'd seen a woman this undressed in his life, and he was shocked.

"You like them don't you?" Yuffie said, giving her hips a little shake, and then nodded, and slid into the shorts.

Cloud shook his head, and said, "Yeah... Really cute."

"Good, now let's go look at your stuff... I want to help you now!" Yuffie said, grabbing Cloud's hand again, and dragging him back to Tifa's room.

They where back in Tifa's room in no time, and Yuffie was tossing out a bunch of tank tops and low cut tees, looking for the right one.

"You've got this really cute black shirt that I love, where is it?" Yuffie asked, looking at him for some guidance.

"Uh... I don't remember where I put it." Cloud said, thinking desperately about where it might be.

"But... It's your favorite shirt? How could you not know where it is?"

"I think it's in the wash." Cloud replied, saying the first place that came to his mind when he didn't know where an article of his clothing was.

"Oh! Don't tell me that! I want us to be twins!" Yuffie cried, as she threw more of Tifa's clothes everywhere.

After what felt like hours, Yuffie, having thrown half the wardrobe's worth of clothes on the ground, came up with a smile.

"Found it!" She said, bouncing over to him, and showing him the shirt.

It was a black tank top as well, with the words "Devil's Little Angel" on it in red pointed letters. It was to Cloud's shock, a very revealing shirt, and he could feel a blush rushing up to his cheeks.

"And you can wear a pair of black shorts too, sense you seem to really like them."

Cloud nodded, and stared at the top with a sort of morbid fascination.

"Uh... Tif? You going to get dressed?" Yuffie asked, waving a hand in front of Cloud's eyes, causing him to snap to attention.

"Yeah... Okay." He said absently, as he started to strip off his shirt, putting on the black one, and then looking at himself in the mirror.

What Cloud saw was something many guys would kill to see, and Cloud sat there, looking slightly frightened at the sight, unsure if he was about to cry or have to use the bathroom.

He snapped out of his stupor, and looked around to see Yuffie smiling.

"You'll knock 'em out! There's nothing like hooters that can box for you hey? Wish mine where a little bigger." She said, pushing her chest up with her hands, as to demonstrate her desires.

"You don't want them any bigger... Trust me..." Cloud said, with a little too much loathing escaping than he had intended.

Yuffie laughed, and motioned for him to put on the shorts.

Cloud complied, but felt a little embarrassed at the attention he was getting from Yuffie.

"That's another thing you've got to tell me! How the hell do you get abs like that?" She said, showing him her flat stomach, and grimacing.

"Working out." Cloud said, as he buckled the black leather belt around the pants.

"Hmm... I should try that sometime... Instead of eating chocolate and sitting around... They say hyper active metabolisms don't always stay hyper." She said sadly, patting her belly, and then pulling down her shirt.

"We should get going though." She continued, and grabbed Cloud's hand again.

She dragged him down the stairs and out to the three wheeled truck.

"We've got like a half hour before show starts!" She cried, jumping into the front next to Cloud, and watched him fumble with the keys.

Finally Cloud got the truck started, and pushed down the gas petal a little to hard, and the truck gave a loud growl, and shot forward like a cork, nearly throwing them into the dashboard.

"Gaia Tifa! What the hell was that?" Cried Yuffie, as she rubbed her head where it had hit the window.

"Sorry." Cloud said, and pushed down on the gas with less force.

"_I haven't driven a fricken car in over four years!_" Cloud thought, as he eased on the gas.

They started off again, but this time at the slow and stately pace of 20mph.

"If we go this slow Tifa, we'll be late!" Yuffie complained, pointing at the dashboard light.

"Fine! You want to drive?!" Cloud replied, pulling up the emergency break by mistake, which made the truck go into a doughnut in the middle of the road.

"Are you trying to kill us?" Yuffie yelled, as she was flung into Cloud's lap.

"No!" Cloud said, as the truck stopped, smoke rising from the tires, giving off the pungent smell of burnt rubber.

"Well you made a good attempt!"

"Sorry, I'm a little... Nervous..." Cloud said, feeling relieved that the street that they where on was empty and dark.

Yuffie laughed.

"Worried about what? The guys?" She said, giggling madly.

"Uh..."

"Tifa! You know as well as me, that once you've had a few drinks, you're the life of the bar!" Yuffie continued.

"But..."

"Don't worry!" She said again, patting Cloud on the shoulder.

Cloud gave up, and looked at the dashboard.

"So... Can I drive?" Yuffie asked hopefully.

Cloud turned to her, about to say 'go ahead, be my guest' when he remembered who he was speaking to.

"On second thought, how about I just keep going?" He said, silently preying to Gaia that they got there alive.

They continued after a few more moments, and arrived at the bar with a few minor problems, but they where alive, that's what counted.

"So? You ready for the greatest night of your life?" Yuffie said, pulling Cloud toward the door to the bar.

Cloud merely whimpered in response, but Yuffie took it as a 'yeah, let's go party till we drop.'


	5. Bar Troubles

Chapter 5: Bar Troubles

Cloud really wondered if he was going to have the 'best night of his life', knowing that that would involve a lot of alcohol, and possibly a bunch of horny guys. He thought this was actually going to be the worst night of his life.

They pushed past many tables of drunk or soon to be drunk people, Cloud receiving several appreciative slaps to his bottom as he passed by particularly bold idiots.

"Take yer shirt off love! You'ves got a nice rack!" Boomed a large man with a scraggly beard.

"Go to hell you ass." Cloud replied, hating every moment they spent in the bar like a child hates broccoli.

The man stood up, and looked at Cloud with anger in his eyes.

"WHA YOU CALL ME BITCH?!" He bellowed, wobbling on his unsteady feet as he pointed an accusing finger at Cloud.

"I told you to go to hell." Cloud answered, giving the man a cold glare that would make any sane man hide and cover himself up in fear. But this man turned out to be completely insane.

"YOU WANNA FIGHT BITCH?! I'LL BEAT YAH GOOD, WHORE!" He cried, as he lurched toward them with frightening speed for a drunk man.

But before the man even moved a foot, he stumbled with a great cry of pain, and collapsed onto a table, which shattered as he hit it.

Then a man with long dark red hair came swaggering up to them with a grin on his face.

"Sup Tif? How's Seventh Heaven doing?" He said, casually slipping the taser back into his pocket.

Another man appeared next to the red head, adjusting his sunglasses, and straightening his tie.

"Hello." He said to them, inclining his head slightly toward them in greeting.

Cloud looked at the two men with a shocked look, and then spluttered,

"R-Re-Reno? Rude? What're you two doing here?" He asked.

"We're here saving you from big burly assholes who've had too much to drink." Reno replied, grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

Rude just nodded his agreement, and checked his watch.

"Reno, ten minutes..." He said, and walked off toward the door.

Reno gave a curt nod, and turned back to Cloud.

"So, I asked how Seventh Heaven was doing..." He asked again, looking at Cloud for an answer.

Cloud thought about the question for a moment, and then nodded.

"That's great! I'll tell you, it's the best spot to stop and get a cold one... No dumb brutes around to harass you, right?" He smiled some more, and cocked his head slightly, drinking in the sight before him.

Cloud nodded again, and looked away.

"Want a drink? S'on me okay?" Reno said turning to the bar tender, and shouting something that Cloud wasn't paying attention too.

Yuffie was smiling the whole time, as she watched Reno try to weasel his way into Cloud's heart, and failing miserably to do so.

"You seem a little down Tif? Drink up, it'll make you feel better." Reno said as he handed Cloud the drink.

Cloud looked down at the dark brown liquid in the glass, and nearly threw it in Reno's face.

"I'm fine." Cloud snapped, taking a sip of the liquor, and almost gagging.

"What the hell is that?!" Cloud gasped, sloshing some of the alcohol onto Reno's suit.

For a moment Reno's ever enduring grin seemed to falter as he stared down at the large damp spot on his new jacket, but it quickly reappeared when he answered Cloud.

"Well by Gaia, it's the most amazing beer I've ever drank in my life! Best brew this side of the world Tifa! And now I've got it decorating my front!" He laughed it off, but the 750gil suit was ruined, and he was sure that he couldn't get reimbursed for it at work.

"Well, I best be off..." He said, nodding again, and then quickly exiting the bar.

Yuffie stared after him, and then turned to Cloud.

"You really screwed that one up Tifa! Why don't you just date the fool already? He's gorgeous, and he's got a fair bit of money when he doesn't spend it on beer." Yuffie said in a tone that suggested utter disbelief.

"Well first off I'm a gu... Uh, I mean I'm ahh... Already dating some one." Cloud said, flinging out the first thought that came to his mind to cover up for his near fatal mistake.

Yuffie looked up at Cloud with a look that would remind you of a kid at Christmas, her eyes wide and full of mischief as she gazed at him.

"You're... You're already dating someone Tifa? And you didn't tell me!? Really?" She said, her wonder dissolving into shock.

"Uh... Well... Not exactly dating..." He continued, as his mind worked at light speed to pick up yet another blunder that he had made.

"My goodness! And I thought you'd never get over Spiky!" Yuffie continued, shaking her head as if she where checking to see if she where dreaming.

"Spiky?" Cloud asked, his eyes narrowing slightly at the nickname.

"Yeah, you know... Cloud!" Yuffie said, grinning at Cloud as a look of shock spread across his face.

"What do you mean... 'Get over Spiky'?" He answered, mouth hanging open.

"Don't try to play innocent with me Tifa! The whole group knows about your little crush on Mr. Choco-head." Yuffie replied, giving Cloud a wink.

"Crush?" Cloud said, still not sure what she was saying.

"Okay... Did you start drinking before we got here? You don't act like a ditz until after you've had a few..."

"No... I haven't!"

"Let me put it simply... We know you love Cloud, Tifa... You're almost madly in love with him... Everyone knows about it... That's how obvious it is! And to think, Spiky's so dense that he doesn't even notice!" She answered, laughing at the fact that Cloud was indeed very dense.

"Tifa like me?" Cloud blurted out, completely forgetting that he _was _Tifa at the moment.

Yuffie gave Cloud an odd look, and shook her head.

"You must have been drinking... You're acting like Cloud!"

Cloud looked taken aback.

"Shit!" He muttered under his breath, and ordered something strong with ice, and laid his head against the table.

Yuffie continued to shoot odd looks at Cloud, while another person watched the two of them with interest.

"_Looks like that pretty girl is having a bad day... I could score some points if I could cheer her up._" The man thought, as he watched Cloud putting his head on the counter.

The man stood, and sauntered over to the bar, and slipped in next to Cloud, and laid a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"You all right there Missy? You're looking a little down?" He asked, rubbing Cloud's back in a comforting manner.

Cloud looked up, and glared at the man.

"Get your hands off of me mister, or I'll remove something..." He said in a threatening way, his eyes narrowed in anger.

"Oh sorry, it was rather brash of me to do that." The man said, removing his hand quickly, and putting it in his lap.

The bar tender brought Cloud the drink, and Cloud downed it in three gulps, and slammed the glass on the counter, ordering another one.

The man stared at Cloud, and then started laughing.

"You drink like a man... Oh, my name is Randy... What's yours?"

Cloud looked at the drink that was being poured, and then looked at Randy, and then back at the drink.

"Tifa..." He said after a few moments, and then he chugged the second drink, and put the glass down again.

"Tifa... I know that name! You run the Seventh Heaven bar in Edge right?"

"Yeah. So?" Cloud asked, as the bar tender filled his glass again.

"Well... I just thought... Never mind, what's on your mind, if you wouldn't mind." Randy said, looking down at the bar, and frowning.

"No... I really don't want to talk to you... Please leave me alone... I've got enough on my mind to worry about." Cloud said, drinking the third beer a lot slower, taking sips instead of gulping it down.

"I'm sorry to bother you Miss, I'll leave now." Randy said, getting up and walking back to his friends, disappointment written clearly across his face.

"Wow Tifa... You really seem down... You haven't gotten over Cloud have you?" Yuffie asked, as she watched the dejected Randy walk back to his table.

"I am... And no, I'm not going to talk about it!" Cloud snapped, as he saw Yuffie opening her mouth to respond.

Yuffie nodded, and ordered herself a cold beer, watching Cloud as she did.

"_I wonder what's gotten into Tif? She seems to be having a really bad day. The bands late, and she's acting pissy like Cloud... What's going on?_"


	6. In Which too Much Alcohol is Consumed

Chapter 6: In Which too Much

Alcohol is Consumed

Tifa meanwhile was at the 'house' as the members of Avalanche called it, feeling extremely bored. She sat in Cloud's room, looking around at the many sundry things that he had scattered around the room. Various swords and motorcycle parts littered the desk and floor, and a few manuals on bike repair sat on the bedside table.

She sighed, and got up, looking at herself in the mirror.

"_Of all the people in Avalanche, it had to be Cloud... This really sucks._" She thought, as she moped around, trying to act sulky.

She stopped in front of the mirror, and looked at herself, the chocobo haired hero staring back at her.

"_Oh if only you knew Cloud... How much I longed to know you... And here I am, living in your body, and hating every moment of it..._"

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Cloud was by now giggling to himself, as he drank his eighth beer. His eyes where slightly crossed, and he would lurch to one side or the other, and give a hiccup. Yuffie was staring at him like he'd gone mad.

"And I was like, look you buffoon I'll beat your pasty face in, and he ran away like a little chicken." Cloud said, as the group of avid men watched him weave on his stool, holding the remains of his last drink.

"Wow... You're one tough bitch aren't you gal?" One of Cloud's admirers said, laughing.

"I bet she's lying like a rug... Just in it for the attention... I'd give her some of my attention!" The man whispered to his partner, and then proceeded to walk up to Cloud.

"You look like you're a little lonely miss... Have you got a boy?" The man asked, sitting next to Cloud.

"No... Haven't got a boy... hyuck... I'm not gay..." Cloud said, looking unsteadily at the man next to him.

"Good... How's about I take you home... You look like you're past your limit..."

The man grabbed Cloud by his elbow, and lifted him from the stool.

"Nah... hyuck... I'm fine... Haven't even started..." Cloud said, as the man pulled him along.

"No babe... Don't worry... I've got you." He said, a slightly sadistic smile on his face.

He let his hand drift down to Cloud's butt, and gave it a gentle slap.

Cloud gave a gasp, and turned to the man.

"You asshole... hyuck... Don't you dare!" And shoved the man away from him, causing the man to stumble into a table.

"Common babe... I didn't hurt you did I?" The man said, as he stood up from the ground.

"You bastard!" Cloud said, swinging a punch at the man, and connecting solidly with his jaw.

The man fell back, and gave a growl.

"Little slut... You're going to pay for that!" He said, wiping the blood that trickled from the corner of his mouth.

Cloud reached for his sword, but his hand didn't find its hilt anywhere, and he cursed.

"Yuffie! Where the hell is my sword?" Cloud shouted, looking over at Yuffie to get an answer.

"You don't have one Tifa!" Yuffie answered, looking even more confused.

Cloud grunted, and turned back to the man, who had taken off his jacket.

"You ready to feel hurt bitch?" The man asked, cracking his knuckles.

Cloud gave a lurch, and lifted his fists.

"Guess I'll have to... hyuck... do this the old fashioned way." He said, and stumbled toward the man.

The man threw a punch, and Cloud ducked it, something he probably wouldn't have done if he where in his own body.

He drove in, and hit the man with two jabs to the gut, knocking the wind out of the guy. He finished the attack with a well-placed roundhouse kick, which sent the man crashing to the floor, trying to recover his breath.

"That's for being a bitch." Cloud said, and staggered back to the bar.

"Ma'am... I'm going to have to ask you to leave the bar..." The bar tender said, as Cloud approached.

"Why?" Cloud asked, trying to look at the bar tender, but his eyes just wouldn't focus.

"You've fought in a public bar... That's something we discourage." The man said apologetically.

"Fine... I was getting sick of this place anyways..." Cloud murmured, and staggered toward the door.

Yuffie gave a disappointed groan, and followed Cloud out of the bar, only to find him passed out on the side of the road.

"What the hell's gotten into you?" She said, as she hoisted Cloud's limp form to her shoulders.

"She's right... I don't want big boobs... They weigh too much." She grumbled, as she stumbled along the sidewalk, to the truck. They reached it, and Yuffie panted from the exertion of carrying Cloud. She fished the keys out of Cloud's pocket, and put it in the ignition. With a turn, the truck gave a sputtering wheeze, and didn't start.

"Oh for goodness sake!" Yuffie said, slamming her fist into the steering wheel.

This somehow made the truck work, for she gave one last try to starting it, and it came to life.

She stared at the pedals, trying to figure out how the truck worked.

"_I think this one's the gas._" She thought, as her foot hovered over the break.

She pushed down on it, and nothing happened.

She tried the other pedal, and the truck started to move forward.

"Yes!" She said happily, as she slammed the break, making the truck jerk to a halt.

"How the hell does it go backwards?" She said, looking at the stick shift in the middle of the cabin.

"This must be it." She pulled on the shift, and it didn't budge. She pulled harder, and still nothing.

"Is it stuck?" She wondered, throwing her weight against it, when it gave, and moved down to the '2'.

"STUPID THING!" She cried, trying to move it to the 'R', but it wouldn't move.

Then she noticed another pedal, and she stared at it.

"What the hell is that?" She asked out loud, hopping the Cloud would answer, but he was to busy being unconscious.

She pushed on it, and there was a 'thunk' from somewhere in the front of the car.

"Hmm... Interesting." She said, looking down at the clutch.

She tried it again, and this time it moved smoothly.

"WOW! I GOT IT!" She screeched happily, pushing on the gas, watching in amazement as it moved backwards.

"Ha! In your face Cid! I can too learn how to drive!" She said triumphantly, as she backed the truck into a light post.

"Oh shit!" She gasped, as the loud crunching came to her ears.

She looked to find that the back of the truck now had a pole crushed into it.

She gave a shudder, and looked over at Cloud.

"Looks like I shouldn't drive... Tifa... I really don't like you that much now!" She said, as she got out, and pulled Cloud onto her shoulder.

"We're walking... And I'm going to tell them that you broke the truck." She said, glaring at Cloud. Cloud's head just fell to one side in response, and that was all.


	7. A Shocking Discovery

Chapter 7: A Shocking Discovery

By the time Yuffie got Cloud home, she was going to die. Her body was trembling from head to toe, and she was breathing like Barret does after he's had one of his screaming fits.

She swaggered to the door, and leaned against it resting her head, which was throbbing and covered with sweat.

She gave a knock and then collapsed, panting from dragging Cloud's dead weight.

Tifa who was wearing a grimace as she answered the door, scowled down at Cloud with a look of confusion.

"Great... Just the person I wanted to see... Mr. Pissy Pants." Yuffie whined, looking up at Tifa from the ground.

"What's up with her?" She said, pointing to Cloud.

"Her, do you really want to know?" Yuffie asked as she dragged herself to her feet.

"She had too much to drink... passed out at the wheel... and backed the truck into a light post... It's sitting in the parking lot." Yuffie panted.

Tifa's eyes widened, and she growled.

"That's my truck... Why'd he go and break it?" She said, grabbing Cloud from under the shoulders and lifting him up to drag him to the couch in the other room, happy that Yuffie hadn't heard her slip up.

"I know... What a silly." Yuffie said, stumbling into the house and nearly taking out a coat rack by the door.

"Are you drunk too?" Tifa asked as she pulled Cloud along the carpet.

"No... Carried her from the bar... Body feels like Jello."

"Oh..." Tifa answered, trying not to look too concerned.

Yuffie staggered up the stairs, and went to her room, while Tifa attended to Cloud.

"What an ingrate... Getting drunk and crashing MY truck... If he was himself I'd pummel him silly!" She whispered, tossing Cloud onto the couch.

She went about getting a bucket and some cold water and a rag, and proceeded to try and wake Cloud up.

As she laid the cold cloth over Cloud's forehead, Barret walked in.

"What're you doin'?" He asked, quite confused as too why Cloud would be nursing anyone back to health.

"I'm trying to wake her up... She crashed the truck!" Tifa said miserably, looking over at Barret for sympathy.

"What! Don't you hate that thing!? You always use your motorcycle, and now you're sad that truck is crashed?" Barret shook his head in confusion.

"Must be the Vodka... Getting to my brain. Never mind." Barret said wondering off to clear his mind.

Tifa glanced at Cloud, who seemed to be still unconscious.

"Wake up stupid!" She said, giving Cloud a shake.

Cloud gave a snort, muttered something about 'mother' and then passed back out.

"...GrrrrrrrRRRRRR! What the hell! Wake up!" She slapped Cloud with a broad hand, and this jerked Cloud out of his stupor, and he looked around as if he had been shot at.

"Gah! What the hell was that for! I was having a weird dream about this guy... Wait... That doesn't sound right..." He said, glaring at Tifa as she stared at him as if he had grown an extra head.

"Are you saying that you just had a dream about a guy? What did he look like?"

"He looked a lot like me... But he was a jerk..." He said, looking at Tifa in an odd manner.

She gasped, and then turned away, blushing furiously.

"Wait a second... That was me wasn't it?" He said, looking at Tifa in confusion.

"Why the hell would I be having dreams...?" He started, and then remembered what Yuffie had said, "_Don't try to play innocent with me Tifa! The whole group knows about your little crush on Mr. Choco-head._".

"Ah ha! You like me!" Cloud said, pointing a finger at Tifa, his brain completely befuddled from the alcohol.

Tifa turned to Cloud, mouth agape like she was trying to catch flies, eyes big as saucers.

Just then Cid walked by.

He saw 'Cloud' gaping, and raised an eyebrow.

"What the hecks your problem... Did Tif's boob fall out of her shirt, because you look like you've seen the wonders of the known world."

Tifa snapped out of her shock, and glared broadswords at Cid (instead of daggers... lolz.).

"No... I just had a realization about Sephiroth." Tifa said, trying to come up with a plausible excuse for her strange behavior on Cloud's behalf.

"What... That he's already got a boy friend... Is that all you ever think about Cloud!?" Cid said in a joking manner.

"Shut up!" Tifa said, intensifying the broadswords into flaming vorpal broadswords.

Cid looked away, apologized, and left without getting an answer.

"So... How did you... um... Find out?" Tifa said, blushing again.

"At the bar... Yuffie asked me if I had gotten over Spiky... Because I told some guy that I had a 'boyfriend'." Cloud explained, trying to figure out what Tifa was thinking.

"Oh." Tifa said, her voice small, something Cloud hoped would never happen again, coming from his mouth,

"So... You know..."

"Yeah..."

"What're you going to do?"

"In this state...? I don't know."

Tifa couldn't hold it back any longer, and she dropped down beside Cloud, and kissed him, despite the odd situation,

The kiss broke, and Cloud just looked up at Tifa with a strange face.

"Uh... What was that?" Came a voice neither of them wanted to hear at this moment, as Yuffie walked in, dressed in her chocobo pj's carrying a stuffed moogle in her arms.

Tifa jumped away from the couch, and looked away.

"Noting." She grunted, trying to look casual, but failed miserably.

"Oh... Did she tell you Choco-head?" Yuffie said, grinning slightly.

"I thought you where going to bed." Cloud said, sitting up on the couch and looking at Yuffie in a strange manner, a combination of both happiness and anger.

"Tell me what? And I told you not to call me that!" Tifa said, eyes narrowing again.

"Oh... Maybe she hasn't... Never mind." She replied, grinning again,

"You wait there Missy!" Tifa bellowed, pointing a finger at Yuffie.

"Tell me what?"

"Did you just call me 'Missy' Cloud?" Yuffie asked, confusion clouding her face.

"Yeah... Yeah I did! Problem?" Tifa asked, putting her hands on her hips.

Yuffie just stared.

"Have you been taking lessons with Tifa? You've got the whole hands-on-the-hips thing down, and that frown is vaguely reminiscent of Tifa's displeased face." Yuffie asked.

"_Shit!_" Tifa thought, quickly removing her hands from her hips.

"Uh... No... What the hell are you talking about anyways?" Tifa said, trying to make up for her fumble.

"Never mind again... I really am going to bed now." Yuffie just wanted to get out of the awkwardness, and just go to sleep.

She hefted the moogle doll, and went up stairs before the others could protest.

That left Cloud and Tifa to stare at each other in awkwardness.


	8. When Things Go 'BUMP' in the Night

The second scene of this chapter was written by Mitts, the most amazing Final Fantasy story writer in all of Fanficion...

Chapter 8: When Things Go 'BUMP' in the Night

Cloud and Tifa stared at each other for a while longer, and then Tifa gestured to Cloud with a thumb.

"Let's go to bed upstairs... This couch is kinda uncomfortable." She said, offering a hand to help Cloud up.

Cloud took the hand greatfully, and was tugged up with surprisingly little effort.

"Wow... I've never realized how strong you are Cloud." Tifa said, in a slight awe of the demonstration of strength.

They walked upstairs together, smiles on their faces, happy that the secret was out.

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When they got to their rooms, Tifa looked sadly at Cloud.

"Um... We could... You know... Sleep in my bed... To... together... It's really comfortable..." She said, flushing a brilliant red that would have rivaled Red's coat.

"Uh... You want to... Share a bed... with... yourself?" He asked confusedly, his brain still befuddled by the alcohol he had consumed earlier.

"Well... No... I want to share a bed with... with... with you!" She said, looking at him sadly again.

"I just want to sleep..." Cloud muttered, entering Tifa's room, and beckoning Tifa to follow.

Tifa gave a slight 'squee' of joy, and came in, settling on her bed with a sigh.

"I've missed this bed..." She said, laying back, and grinning.

"It's a nice bed." Cloud said, settling next to her and closing his eyes.

Tifa snuggled close, and pulled Cloud's hand onto his own stomach, and smiled at him with a child like grin of happiness.

Lying on the bed beside Tifa, Cloud gently smoothed his fingers down her hard flat stomach,_ his_ hard flat stomach. His big blue eyes stared back at him, filled with lust and longing. This felt wrong in so many ways, and yet, at the same time, he couldn't deny the tingling sensations that were shooting through his, through Tifas, body...

"Cloud... Please... kiss me." Strong fingers reached out, pulling on loose clothing, tugging Cloud down closer. Lips, soft and tender, met together, and Cloud finally succumbed to the overpowering feelings he had for Tifa. He felt a yearning need in what should have been his groin area, and going by the hardness he felt in the exact same spot on Tifa, she felt the same way too.

He reached out to fondle her breasts, to cup her fullness within his hold, but of course, he only found the smooth, hairless, flat expanse of his own chest beneath his fingers. That didn't stop him from tweaking the excited nipples though, and he was rewarded with a gasp of pleasure coming from his mouth… Apparently he like that!

Tifa arched Clouds spine upwards, as she moaned and thrust in jerking movements. She wanted so much for Cloud to penetrate her, to make her his... but at the same time, she wanted desperately to take hold of Clouds erection that was sprouting up from her, and plant it some place hot and tight and wet.

Cloud slid on top of her, his instincts as the alpha taking over. If anyone would've looked into the room at their love making, they would have been amazed to see an aggressive dark haired girl astride a submissive blond haired boy.

Opening legs willingly to him, Tifa let him remove the clothing that covered the body she was in, watching as he then undressed her body above her, slightly uncomfortable as her two huge globes of flesh were released from the reinforced bra she had to wear for support.

Giggling, trying to ease off the slight embarrassment in the air, Cloud grasped the breasts and squeezed them, wiggling on top of Tifa's, _his_, pinned body, as he juggled them up and down, moving and placing Tifa's entrance near his erect cock.

With a growl, and strength she didn't know she possessed, Tifa grabbed hold of the slim hips poised about her, and thrust hard upwards, impelling the body above her in one swift movement.

The pain that shot through Cloud lasted only seconds, before the feeling of fullness inside of him took over, and he wanted more. He slammed himself down hard on the invading member within him, lost in the powerful and heady feelings that were making him forget all reason, all sanity.

Tifa, eyes closed, held on tight to the body that surrounded her. She would never have guessed that invading another's body could be so pleasurable. She could feel a tightening somewhere deep inside, and her thrusting motions became more desperate. She knew she needed release, but she didn't know how to achieve it. All she was aware of was that she needed to keep ramming into the moist, hot tightness that encased her.

Cloud could feel himself reaching the brink of his climax. He let out an animalistic roar as shudders hit him from all sides, fingers clutching spasmodically at the bedclothes in an effort to maintain the feeling, to keep it going, to extend it for an eternity.

Beneath him, Tifa pushed one final time, and breathed deeply as spasms tore through her, as she pulsated and released the pent up seed deep within the willing body that was slowly relaxing above her.

Flopping down to lay beside her once again, Cloud couldn't stop giving a great big, satisfied smile. Fingers intertwined.

"Tifa..."

"Yeah?"

"That was... fucking amazing," he finally managed to say.

"Mmmm..." She nuzzled into him, a sudden feeling of fatigue taking over her. She needed to rest, to recover her strength.

"Ewwww Tifa…." Cloud called out, alarmed.

"Huh? What?" she asked, hardly able to open tired eyes.

Cloud moved away a little from her, his feeling of disgust marring her pretty features. "There's a wet patch beneath me... I'm lying in a wet patch!"

"Get use to it," Tifa chuckled, curling up, and surrendering to sleep.

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Meanwhile, Yuffie lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling trying to ignore the noises from her neighbor's room, but at the same time grinning, knowing that Tifa had finally told him.

"_I'm so happy...? I guess... I just wish they where a little quieter..._" She thought, covering her head with the moogle doll to block out the noises, and trying to fall asleep.

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Author's Note: As I said, the love scene was written by none other than THE Mitts of Fanfiction... I didn't want to ruin the chapter, so I didn't tell what she wrote. You should check out her awesome stories: Final Fantasy: Ever After, and OBSESSION... They're very good... For those who love FF7!!

This is Sir Edward, thanks for reading and reviewing my story, and I hope to see you guys on the Flipside!!


	9. The Next Morning

Chapter 9: The Next Morning

The next morning woke the two sleeping lovers in a bright and happy way, birds singing outside the window, warm rays of sun teasing their flesh, the smell of each other tickling their noses, it was a perfect morning.

Cloud gave a shudder of happiness, and grinned, when he noticed something strange.

"_Why am I on the other side of the bed?_" He thought, raising a broad hand to scratch his head. When he felt spiky locks instead of long black ones, he gave a cheer filled whoop, and shook Tifa awake.

"Hey! We're normal again! I'm me!" He cried, as Tifa mumbled about sleep, and needing rest. Then as the word took their sweet time to sink into her mind, she realized what he had said.

"We're... normal?" She asked, lifting a hand to see that it was her own.

"WE'RE NORMAL!" She screeched, jumping out of bed and looking at herself in the mirror.

She hugged herself with glee, and then ran back to the bed.

"Let's get dressed! I'm so excited!" She said, running jubilantly to her closet, and pulling out some clothes.

She tugged on her favorite shirt, and a pair of her black shorts, and ran to the bathroom, where Cloud heard her give another squeal of joy.

Tifa came bursting into the room, and said,

"It's all there! Everything! I missed my body! But you left a bruise on my hip... I told you to be careful!" She said, eyeing Cloud with amusement.

"Sorry... I did that when I was chasing after Cid... That bastard can run fast for an older man!" Cloud replied, glad that she didn't come seeking vengeance upon him, his body was still a little worn out from last night.

"Well at least it isn't that big. If this ever happens, be more careful!" She said, waving a finger in his face.

"I hope like hell it doesn't." Cloud replied.

"Your breasts are the worst things I've had to live through, no offence."

Tifa stared at him with utter disbelief.

"You say that after what happened last night?" She said teasingly.

"Uh... Yeah... Those things are just... Never mind." He said, noticing the glare he was receiving.

"That's right! You wont be saying that after I'm though with you!" She said, her eyes narrow, but full of mischief.

"Now? I'm not recovered from the last time!" Cloud cried, his eyes wide.

She smiled, and shook her head.

"No, not now, but soon." She answered, and then she left without another word.

Cloud stared after her, still shocked at what she had said to him.

Then he decided that he should dress and go down stairs, his stomach was grumbling and he wanted to eat.

He dressed quickly, and opened the bedroom door, only to find Yuffie standing there with a smile on her face.

"Congrats Choco-head! How was it last night?" She asked, grinning like the Cheshire cat.

Cloud stared at her, and then at her room, noticing that it WAS awfully close to Tifa's room, and they DID make a lot of noise last night.

"Uh... Good, I guess?" Cloud said, trying to avoid Yuffie's gaze.

"Just good, it sounded like a pack of rabid animals in there! 'Oh Cloud!' and all that!" Yuffie continued, her grin getting broader.

Cloud flushed slightly, and mumbled something about needing to go to the bathroom and fled.

Yuffie just continued to smile, hoping to tease Tifa about it too.

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Down stairs, Tifa was preparing breakfast, when Yuffie came in with a grin on her face.

"Hey Tif! How'd yah sleep last night...? Judging by all the noise I heard, it sounded like it was pretty difficult. What was going on in there? Did you buy a herd of elephant or something? It sure sounded like it." She said in a nonchalant manner.

Tifa dropped the egg she had in her hands on the ground, where it promptly splattered with a satisfying 'Scraplat!'.

"Elephants? It sounded like elephants?" She asked, turning to Yuffie with a look of shock on her face.

"Yeah, and a dying cow that had a thing for Cloud... "Oooooh CLOOOOOOD!" She said giggling at the older woman who was blushing a brilliant red by then.

"You where... Up?" Tifa spluttered, trying to come to grips with what Yuffie was saying.

"Yeah... Unfortunately..." Yuffie said, shaking her head.

Tifa's eye twitched, and she frowned at the young ninja standing before her.

"I'm glad you finally told him how you feel about him... Good going!" Yuffie said with another grin, and then she left the kitchen, and sat at the table waiting for breakfast.

Tifa stood in shock, as the eggs burned, finally catching her attention when they started smoking.

"Oh crud! I burnt them!" She muttered, taking the pan off the stove and dumping the burnt eggs into the sink.

After that little incident, the cooking went fine without any unnecessary interruptions.

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At breakfast the group (everyone came down while she was making her second batch of eggs) watched Tifa and Cloud, wondering if they would do anything strange again.

Finally, Yuffie broke the silence with a giggle, and turned to face Tifa and Cloud.

"So guys, guess what?" She asked the group, grinning with a gleam in her eyes.

"What?" the others said, still watching Tifa and Cloud.

"Cloud and Tifa finally admitted their feelings for each other!" She cried, laughing at the faces that she received from Cloud and Tifa.

The others gasped (except Vincent, who really doesn't seem to get surprised by anything), and Cid clapped.

"That's great guys!" He said, laughing.

Cloud glared at Yuffie, while Tifa smiled.

"That's right guys... We finally told each other." She said, smiling at Cloud.

It was as if the group both expected and didn't expect this to ever happen, they all wore expressions of shock and joy, a combination that left Red looking more like he was either going to kill someone or had to go to the bathroom.

"So yah asked her, finally!" Barret said, cuffing Cloud on the shoulder.

Cloud continued to glare at Yuffie, who was busily eating her breakfast.

"Yeah... I asked." He said, his gaze still on Yuffie, who looked up, noticed him glaring, and gave him a cheerful smile.

"Tha'da boy Cloud!" Barret replied, cuffing him yet again on the shoulder.

"Okay... enough! Lets just eat in silence!" Cloud muttered, glaring around the table now.

The others fell silent, and ate, but they kept glancing at Tifa and him, and grinning.

And that's how the morning went.


	10. The After Events

Chapter 10: The After Events

(One Week Later)

Cloud and Tifa lay in bed together, enjoying the warm tingling feeling of their love making, sighing and laughing about the oddities they now had. For instance, Cloud seemed to like taking the _uke_ (bottom or receiver) position, loving the feeling of Tifa being on top. Also, he seemed to have a fondness for having his nipples played with, something that made Tifa grin when she discovered this. Tifa on the other hand, took on the role of the _seme_ (top) of the sexual relationship. Tifa also retained some of her affection for penetrating, but Cloud quickly dissuaded her of that, not needing her to be sticking things up his butt when he wasn't expecting it. The biggest change, and probably the strangest thing to the outside world, would have been the fact that Tifa wore the metaphorical 'pants' of the relationship, which made Barret roar with laughter the first time he saw it happen in a super market. Cloud didn't seem to mind being Tifa's 'bitch' as Barret had called it.

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Other than a few strange oddities, their relationship flourished, much to Aeris' happiness.

She smiled as she watched the two drifted off to sleep, grins on their faces.

"Ha! It worked!" She said in her spirit state, pumping her fist into the air and waving the other in the 'v for victory' manner.

She drifted over to the spirit that was next to her and pat it on the shoulder.

"Aren't you happy Zack? After all... This _was_ your idea!" She said, poking him lightly in the shoulder.

Zack looked at Aeris, and then smiled, nodding in a happy fashion.

"Yeah... I'm happy for them. They deserve each other. Shall we go and talk to the children, there's a group of them wandering around together looking for their parents?"

"Yes... Let's go help the children." She said, taking Zack's hand, and wondered off with the ex-Soldier, head on his shoulder.

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Cloud snuggled up to Tifa in his sleep, wrapping an arm gently around her, and smiling. Tifa moved closer to Cloud, and rested her head against his chest, sighing in her sleep, a smile also gracing her lips. The two where like yin and yang. Cloud was dark while Tifa was light. Cloud was suppressed and lonely, while Tifa was out there and surrounded by friends. Cloud was quiet; Tifa was always talking to someone. It was strange how love could sprout so strongly between two SO different, and yet so similar as well. With just a little nudge, the two actually fit together like puzzle pieces, and that's what made their relationship so strong.

Epilogue:

Cloud and Tifa lived together, and had a child, a daughter, a smiling baby girl with blazing blue eyes, and long black hair. She grew up with other children, Uncle Cid and Uncle Barret, her 'grandfather' Nanaki, and her 'big sister' Yuffie. This relationship both made Avalanche a family, as well as made some unexpected things happen as well. Yuffie and Vincent finally admitted that they loved each other, Cid and Sharra got married two years after that, Barret found his 'perfect' woman, one who could help him with Marlene and could help him make closure with his messy past. Cait Sith was dismantled, but Reeve did join the Avalanche family, helping them take out the remaining Shin-Ra organization in Junon. The group became close friends, and shared many smaller adventures together that would help to solidify the bonds that they had. Vincent opened up a little more, smiling on the occasion, and startling everyone, even himself. Nanaki shared his past and his history, and finally forgave his father, and now proudly uses his proper name Nanaki. Over all, things looked up for the world. The Life Stream restored most of the damage done to the planet, and the 'new' Shin-Ra Corporation was founded, helping to fulfill its promise to find an alternative energy source, that they could replace. The world to this day has been one of peace and prosperity.

_**THE END!**_


End file.
